Thursday, February 26, 2009

High School Musical III

My baby girl freaking loves this franchise! I've no idea why it's called a franchise, either. McDonald's is a franchise, yet so is a series of movies? Even if said movies are owned by Disney? I've never cared for it, but my daughter has an appreciation for music that I couldn't give her, so there's some good that comes from it, I guess. I've seen all three of them; one and two a multitude of times, and we just finished watching part three. There's loads to dislike about part three, let me rattle the minor ones off in a run on sentence as quickly as I can. It's too long it's a typical musical where the players spontaneously break out in song it's the gayest basketball playing I've ever seen the plot is jumpy the songs really REALLY suck this time it felt like the writers threw something together at the last moment and even the actors seem burned out on the whole fricken thing. Now to the bigger problems I had with the movie.

It's the senior year for the characters. PLEASE dear Lord in heaven, the father, the almighty, the creator of heaven and earth, of all that is seen and unseen ... don't let them make College Musical I. These are supposedly 17 and 18 year olds. Throughout the movie, Troy and Gabriella are trying to find a moment's solitude, so they can mack. Well, not really. Whenever they do, it's the lightest most innocent little peck. Now, I know, tweens are their target demographic, which really means that first and second graders wind up being the fan base. I don't want my little cupcake watching a full on make out session with Troy grabbing a handful of ass or anything like that. But to the non innocent of us watching, it's such crap. You can't get through the movie at all without thinking, "if this were real high school, Troy would reach over ad naseum and get a handful of Gabriella's tiny lil titty." He was the captain of the All State basketball team, second year running. You know he'd have the world's hugest ego. She was a supposed brainiac, getting a full ride to Stanford University. In high school, she'd have felt shunned by the stuck up conceited "pretty girls" and would've been permanently planted on Troy's cock because of all the attention that being his boyfriend would bring her. She'd do anything and everything she could to keep that going.

The worst part of this movie, and I hope my daughter doesn't get this bullshit etched into her brain, is in the first song. They're playing the championship game, and (Dear God NOOOO!) the Wildcats are down like forty-some-odd points. Poor Troy, gets fouled, and the anxiety is getting to him. Gabriella stands up and sing-screams his name, "TROOOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYY," and singingly (is that a word?) Troy informs her that right now, he can hardly breathe. Gabriella sings back, "you can do it, just know that I believe."

Troy sings back, "and that's all I really need," and proceeds to help lead the team to victory. Do little girls need to think that they're the main inner strength of a jock? Do girls dream of being a man's sole/main motivation in everything?

"He's winning the game for me!" Ummm ... bullshit. His focus is on the game, his mind is as far away from you as the moon is from the earth. Your support and/or belief changes the outcome of a sporting event not one iota. Do we really need to put the smallest inkling of an idea like this into impressionable kids' heads? Adult women thinking shit like this is bad enough.

1 comment:

  1. The lady doth protest too much, methinks. ;)

    LOL! I couldn't resist...I had to yank your chain.